Saturday, November 20, 2010

Swing Swing From The Tangles of My Heart

I decided a while ago that I was going to live with dignity, clean up my act, and quit letting my more animalistic side have so much free reign in my life. Basically, it's been an exercise in being "civilized" and trying to be more restrained- you know, quit letting my mouth run away with me (what I fondly call "word puke"), quit letting my "drives" take over. Become cerebral.
What I've found is that this is harder said than done multiplied by eleventy billion. I am not good at not saying exactly what I think, I am not good at saying no to things that I want sooooo bad. But, I've done it. And I deserve a goddamn cookie.

Here's why:
1. There's this man, you see, that has more than picqued my interests (if ya know what I mean :p). And, despite every fiber of my body screaming "you want it, have it", I listened to my brain, and I spoke my mind, carefully. I told him no- because I don't want to be a number and I deserve better than that. I want something more meaningful in my life than a good memory of what happened once upon a time.....and delayed gratification is one of the juiciest things in the world. :) See? Still managed to sneak a tease in there....
And he said "I don't want you to be a number either."
Gold star for me! And a gold star for him, too.

2. While walking across the street in Abbeville, a really gross guy came walking up, wanting to know if I was married, and, hesitantly, instead of lying and being mean and giving him a lesson in pick-up etiquette, I said "no", and continued on my way. Then he said "then put your number in my phone", and held it out to me. And, instead of unleashing on him, I said "Um, no. Thank you and goodbye". Waaaaaaaaaaaay nicer than anything I would've done two months ago.

Gold star!

3. I have restrained myself from doing any illegal activities, buying CDs or movies, or clothes. I've put my money away for bills and savings. This isn't new- but I've been wanting all these things for so long.
Gold star!

And, as we all know, three gold stars means a cookie.

I've made a new friend at work. Her name is Kat, and she's awesome. She's sooo pleasant, so nice, so much fun. I enjoy her company every single day because nine times out of ten, we're experiencing technical difficulties and we can't do anything but sit and wait. We mix very well and we're very comfortable with one another. She's one of the rare souls that I immediately liked and trusted. Apparently, we also favor physically, because most of the people that we work with think that we're sisters or cousins. She's got long brown curly hair like mine and we share skin tone, but that's about it. But people keep saying we favor in the face...and we don't see it. But whatever. Maybe she's a sister in soul. :) It is good to have a new friend.

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